plushaeusrumpified | Seven Smuppets; ANONYMOUS TEXT

OWNER OF RUMP: Masato Hijirikawa

GENDER OF RUMP: Male

RATING OF RUMP: ▪▪▪▪▫

REVIEW OF RUMP

Whoa there, errbody stop what you're doing and get a load of that ass. You can stare at it a minute, it's okay. I can wait.

You finally finished staring? I don't blame you if you need a few more minutes, but the review has to carry on at some point, so I'm just gonna go ahead and talk about what a fine piece of meat that is Masato Hijirikawa's badonkadonk. Masato, either you have some damn fine genes, or you've found a plastic surgeon capable of doing some really goddamn fine ass lifts, because it's been a long while since I've seen such a plump, tight ass. Keep it up and you ain't gonna have to worry about saggy cheeks for a damn long time. You might wanna consider botox to keep your face as tight as your ass, though. A wrinkly face with a smooth ass is a weird combination.

I don't know if you're a top or a bottom, but an ass like that is definitely bottom material. It's the perfect kind of ass that you just wanna latch onto and then pound into. Like damn, I bet it jiggles in the hottest way. Not the fat, nasty way that reminds you of jello, but the sexy, bootylicious kind of way. This is all pure speculation, though, but I'm pretty damn good at booty speculations. Basically what I'm saying is this would make a great porn butt. I'm not saying you should go into porn or anything, but I AM saying that you have the butt of a pornstar and you should own it. Make of that what you will, but I think 'Masato gets stuffed!' would make a great porn title. Just throwing that out there.

I think the only thing this butt needs is some nice, tighter pants to really show it off. I mean, when you've got a butt like that, you want everybody to know about it. Trust me, I know. So as my gift to you, I'm sending you a package with some tight booty shorts, just in time for Summer. Really, the pants are the only reason I'm docking a point off, and let me assure you it pains me to do so. My chest physically hurts right now, because baby, you deserve a 5. Maybe you'll get a 5 in a follow up, if I get a pic of you in those shorts. Until then? My final rating is 4 outta 5.

That's all for this month's RTR. If you enjoyed it, be sure to check back next month, 'cuz I'll be rating another rump for all my booty bros out there. Stay bootylicious, y'all.

ADDITIONAL RUMP NOTES
❏ WHAT A BOOTY ❏ SHOULD CONSIDER A CAREER IN LAP DANCING ❏ I BET IT'S HAIRLESS ❏ BOUNCE A COIN OFF THAT AND IT'LL BOUNCE BACK AND TAKE OUT YOUR EYE ❏ I WANNA USE IT AS A PILLOW ❏ SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE IT ❏ DIP IT LOW ❏ PICK IT UP SLOW ❏ POP TA POP TA POP THAT THANG ❏ YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE A MAN SAY OH

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[lalala oh look it's such a pretty post! Wow people are so talented how do you even make this kind of stuff. wowowow

Wonder what it's about lalalalala]

[Huh? Hijirikawa's name? What's it doing in here...?

...what does he mean by "bottom"? Wow that's a lot of curse words.]

[OMFG NO, THAT'S---

IT'S---

BUT---]

W-why are you talking about Hijirikawa-san's---uh...oh no! [BEAT RED]

His what? His butt? His booty? His luscious, perky, bulbous buttocks? Which one? If you're wondering why I'm talking about them, it's because they're perfect in almost every way. Why wouldn't I talk about his glorious gluts?

I-I...but...he....

[SOBBING, SHE IS SO RED. PLEASE STOP]

B-because I don't think Hi-hijirikawa-san would a-appreciate it!

You'd think a guy would appreciate getting his ass rated. I mean, if somebody reviewed mine, I'd be pretty damn happy. Anyway, don't you think he has a great butt? You should look at it a while. Give me your own personal rating.

W-well Hijirikawa-san is v-very proper and...and I-I don't know! I'd rather not think about that! He's my friend...!

Just because he's your friend doesn't mean you can't check out his butt. I have friends and I check out their asses all the time. Ain't nothing wrong with it. So come on, what would you rate it? Inquiring minds need to know.

I-I don't do anything like that! Please don't suggest that! [;A;]

Seven Smuppets; ANONYMOUS TEXT

AHAHAHA /CRYING also 1/3

2/3 I CAN'T AKLDJFOIDA

OKAY [Video]

omg what a kawaii- also anon text on this guy's end forever

OMG ANON-SAN DON'T DO THIS TO HER

he will do it forever

noooooo omfg

yeeees!! also sorry for slow 8(

askdfja, no I'm sorry for disappearing like that!!